Sunday, September 14, 2008

Waiting on God

I remember the times when I speak to a cousin or aunt I have not seen in a long time. The first thing they ask me, "Do you have a boyfriend?" Then when I tell them no I don't even date they try set me up. Yet since this was in the past lets just say I would be the first one near the door saying okay find me a man. 
They did not seem to realize they were dealing with something that did not need a man for it to fix. I needed God that I may have seen that I was not thinking of being true to anyone I just wanted to see if it would finally appease a loneliness and self-hatred sin had brought me to. I just wanted to see if I would be loved for me. I have done many bad things. I have at one point in my life actually hated the male half of the human species.
Sometimes I wish I could go back and look into my desperate gaze during those troubled years and just say you don't need a man you need Jesus.
God brought me to himself.
What I have learned is that one should not date/court unless they are ready for marriage. One should during times together have an accountability couple with them. They should talk about values, future plans, past issues, should have real friendship, should get to know the person not only from what they themselves say and do but through their parents, siblings, and other church members, they should discuss, goals, expectations for marriage, and how they intend to maintain Christian values (most of this taken from Boy Meets Girl: Say Hello to Courtship).
When I see people who put all their hope in love, then are crushed. I want to sit them nearby hold their hand and ask them, "Are you done trying to search for joy using your own strength?", "Are you finally willing to submit your whole life to the One who can bring you everlasting joy?", I want to tell them, you are settling for so little seeking what will only be temporary. Yet they go on believing that if they maintain in the course they are going they will find favorable results. 
Real love does not seek its own way, it is serving one another looking at the other person as better than ourselves. It is loving as Christ loved the church. I want everyone to know that today's "secular marriages" are nothing, cannot even begin to compare to the awe of two people who love God more than anything, set their sights on marriage. I hope for that myself when I am ready.
I hope I did not go into too many different tangents.

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