Diary of a Single Christian Female 1/21/10

Singhing to myself. Its easy when I am tempted or stumble that I fall back into the ways I used to do things when I wasn't a Christian. I used to pretend I was the good daughter while behind the backs of those who thought they knew me I would take pleasure in defying their expectations. This was bad in high school but came to a head almost a year ago. I felt nothing at the time. It is easy to hide, to keep a desire hidden and for bitterness to take root. Yet God draws me away like the rebellious wife who was punished then drawn away and cherished by her husband. I am loved by God yet why is it so easy to spurn His affection in my desire for... a shadow of it and nothing more.