Revival Within Me

That You would rend the heavens and come down and all people tremble at your presence.

That conviction of sin would come and my eyes look upon my Redeemer.

That Your word would cause me to know You more.

That my affections be focused on my Lord and my God and that it would overflow to loving others.

1 Thessalonians 5:14-24 ESV
And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone. Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. Do not quench the Spirit. Do not despise prophecies, but test everything; hold fast what is good. Abstain from every form of evil. Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it.

May I be pure at heart that I may see God face to face.

Loved

I want to be loved and accepted. It's hard when you are single to feel that way. Yet God's promise to His children is assured. His covenant love is a promised sealed by the blood of Christ that promises a blood bought bride. I wonder though how could God love me.... Yet God promises otherwise.

Regrets

I find myself a lot looking at things I could have done differently, at embarrassing moments, at what I would change.
Yet I have to remind myself not to look at what lies behind but to look ahead to that point in time where I see Christ face to face....

A Desire for Missions

I watch documentaries. I read their biographies. Men and women who forsake their old manner of life and security to gain what they cannot lose.
Mark 8:34-35 ESV
And calling the crowd to him with his disciples, he said to them, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and the gospel's will save it.

There are people who have not heard the truth of the Gospel. People who have heard mangled truth deceived into believing false doctrine about God and about Jesus.
1 Corinthians 1:22-25 ESV
For Jews demand signs and Greeks seek wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified, a stumbling block to Jews and folly to Gentiles, but to those who are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. For the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men.

When I go to different countries I always want to see the work of God there. Believers are family no matter where they are. The body is United in Christ.
Anyway I am restless right now knowing that God has me here in Minnesota for now but wanting God to take me somewhere to show love and hospitality to the brethren wherever God would have me. To encourage the body, that Jesus Christ would be glorified.

Not waiting

I should be up and doing something. I just am finding myself pondering contentment during the marriage class in my church's Sunday school.
I sent a letter with questions to the pastor about what is it to find someone to run the Christian race with. To seek a person for the reason of ministry.
I am wrong I know. In the Bible times were different.... Yet so much easier everything arranged by the families. Now Christian women wait for action from men and it sucks.
Worldly men come at me all the time and I hate that. Christian men locally don't look at me.
Today it was an especially difficult class because it didn't seem to give any hope for those who are single to have their desire for marriage be calmed by fellowship and friendship.
My heart is quick to find offence or to be sorrowed when it come to hearing about marriage. It is brought about by God. He orchestrates it and brings people together.
Contentment I long for, wanting to find my joy in seeing Christ, seeking His face, and being in His word. It's hard but worth it, I want to fight for holding fast to Christ by the work of the Holy Spirit.

Gratitude

It was hard for me to be thankful for the little things, because I focused on what I did not have... I felt like I had done my Christian duty why was God not fulfilling that desire in me to be a wife and mother and later on I got upset with not being granted the opportunity to go for a short time and be on the mission field.
God has taught me since to be grateful for my union with Christ. That He has granted to me all I needed. He has provided a body of believers to fellowship with.
I have a hard time being myself sometimes around them. I hate whining about singleness. I want my faith to be strengthened. I want my friends and family to trust the Lord and be found in Him, clothed in His righteousness alone that day.
I have found that being in the word and being in prayer is such blessing to me. During the day the Scriptures rise up in my mind and strengthen my soul. I want my life to be lived for the Lord. My life belongs to Him.

The prayer life of a believer

So many prayers are in the Bible. From one Psalm the cries out Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
Psalm 65:2 ESV
O you who hear prayer, to you shall all flesh come.
There are also the word in which God promises to be there.
Psalm 50:15 ESV
and call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify me."

So what do you pray for Jesus in the Lord prayer this is what Jesus prays.

Matthew 6:9-13 ESV
Pray then like this: "Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

And He prays in John 17 that we be one with Him as He is one with the Father.
Paul for the Colossians prays that...
Colossians 1:9-14 ESV
And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him: bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God;  being strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy;  giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

I have been more and more convicted about our need for prayer. That we be strengthened in our inner being. That we a rooted and grounded in Love. That we fight and not remain stagnant. That we love one another with a pure heart. That we be more conformed to the image of Christ. That we count all things as loss compared to the reality of knowing Christ as Lord. That we see him and know him and love Him for He is worthy.