Slavery to Sin versus Freedom in Christ

This morning I was thinking a lot about the deceitfulness of sin. In the past the thought of sin lied saying that in indulging it there is satisfaction. There is a lie that says that there's freedom in rebelling against the Lord. The reality of the matter is that in sin all there is is slavery because it will lie and say you have to go further into depravity and sin in order to feel pleasure, relief, satisfaction, even joy. But it is very much what the Bible says in that a person is slave to sin. All they can do is sin unless one has the freedom that is through Jesus Christ. God has been very kind and gracious to me and giving me Freedom through His Son. The freedom though is not freedom to sin but freedom to live a holy life before the Lord. When one through the Spirit has freedom they will want to please the Lord by living according to His commands His words. 

Celebrating Christ

I'm eternally grateful for the King of kings and the Lord of lords. He is the firstborn, Mighty God, Wonderful Counselor, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. It is strange how the season of Advent it only comes around this time of year though I would say the incarnation should be celebrated every Sunday well every day for that matter. It is weird in the American Church to think of the Christian faith as not just a Sunday thing but an everyday thing. It means worshiping God in all that you do everyday. Many years ago when I was at a big church around Resurrection day there was a service where it was like in the Bible when they had a solemn assembly. Sometimes I wonder if some things are staged even in church. I trust that God will vindicate the righteousness of His throne. That His people will worship around the throne. I know that no church is perfect on earth but one day it will be. I will look to the Lord our Perfect head. Lord Jesus Your name is to be honoured and feared, awesome in wonder and power. 

Thoughts about Happily Ever After

Its easy in singleness to think of the wedding as something magical, the end game. In reality its the day in day out struggle of two sinners to love one another with the love of God to share your joys and sorrows to become one with your spouse. To grow each day in the grace and knowledge of God in the roles that God has given husband as provider and wife as the carer and keeper of the home. By God's grace I love my husband more each day. My role given by the Lord is to be his helper, to help in his goals. My husband says I am his personal assistant. 

A Loving Marriage

I have been married for 2 years. Its kind of crazy to think about and to realize how great a gift God granted me when I met my husband October 17, 2021. I was in a healthy place in my life. I was living with friend and though I had been praying for marriage every day I was also taking part in a lot of church activities. My husband was biblically solid, knew God's word. He talked to me. When he met me in Sunday he did not want to wait until Friday to see me so we went out Wednesday the 20th saw each other Saturday the 23rd and went to Ikea where we walked the whole building.

Its crazy how far we have come. Even though we weren't able to get married on March 19th like we had wanted, we are thankful. We met in October, knew we loved each other in November, got engaged in December and got married in April. God is faithful. My hubby is the one God had for me and I am grateful for the gift he is to me.

The Battle for Holiness

It is so early but I felt the need to write. In the Christian life there is a fight to put to death the old man (our previous sins that ensnare us) along with its desires. The battle we wage is using Spiritual means though bodily disciple does help as well. My besetting sin the one that I struggled for many years is written porn. Right bow its not even a desire but with apps like Kindle it brings up what I in the past would have been like yes I have to read that to know what happens next in the series. Yet talking about it is that light of day after reading my bible I see where the battle is waged. It is in bible reading, its in prayers, its in serting my mind in the things above. We battle with sin each day whether its cussing, coarse jesting, lying, sexual sin, anger, worry, unforgiveness, covering, and more. We have to put to death the deeds of the flesh. Kill that old man sin, and live by the Spirit. 

Thoughts in the Middle of the night

I had slept early and now I am awake. I can hear my hubby and though I want to expend my energy I want to go back to sleep. Wanting to be a godly wife is a big desire of mine. The bible says she does him good not harm all the days of her life. I cook, clean, decorate at times. We have adventures together. I have enjoyed marriage so much. I love my hubby very much he is a gift from the Lord to me.

Gratitude

I am thankful for the past because of where I am now. I am thankful to God for a husband who tells lots of jokes, writes me love notes at times, and gets me flowers on occasion just because. 3 years ago I thought I would remain single not knowing that God had orchestrated a meeting between me and my husband. He encourages me to be a better woman. I have grown. I remember him walking around as I talked to a sweet sister and friend Lee. I remember us recounting failed relationships. We talked about our faith in Christ. Janette Iks I Will Wait where she describes the man she waits for that he has the wisdom of Solomon leads like Moses, has God's word tatted all over your heart and your love reminds me of Christ. I treasured that poem and found that man in my husband. So I am thankful for past relationships and experiences that led me to what Christ had for me. 

A New Place to Worship

It has been more than 8 months since we first attended this church. God has been faithful in smoothing fears, granting us a place to hear His word. It is different than I'm used to. We seek to hold fast to God's word. We joined officially mid July separating us fully from my previous church. I do love and miss the people at our previous church. I trust that God will hold fast to His people. I was fearful since July 2023 to entrust ourselves to leadership. What was in the back of my mind was what if we are verbally maligned, what if we are called out from the pulpit. If it could happen in one church could not others do that. Until God returns sin will always be a problem in the church and the only remedy is humilty and repentance, a greater love for God and others and a boldness to do what is right in the face of opposition. I will pray for God's church, its head Christ not man.

Not Yet

I am not a Proverbs 31 woman not yet maybe not fully ever. I want to do good to my husband all the days of my life. This was a conviction a few years before I met my husband. I am very blessed that I am married to him. I find myself nagging ugh I hate that. My husband takes it all in stride.  I want to be more patient and I find that God is granting me the opportunity to do so. I have a desire for children to teach according to God's ways yet I have a condition called PCOS its makes it easy to accumulate weight and makes it more harber to keep off but not only that it makes it even harder to conceive. So I wait and pray.

Having Christ

The end of any good works is to honor and glorify God. Good works can be even cleaning the toilet at church, at home, changing diapers, taking care of the ill and not sounding any trumpets. The Christian life is about private time where no one sees but God, then the Lord being reflected in how you treat others. Meet with Christ personally, love the brethren, count others higher than self. Ministry is nothing if God is not in it.

Fellowship

Tonight was sweet and God has been so kind. This week has been wracked with stress and worries culminated in a time together with believers that was a sweet balm to my weary soul.

Maybe I should be more concise and instead of trying to use similes and metaphors just share my heart on a lot of matters. For me I dislike shallow conversations so when I can I seek to love and listen to others share their heart and struggles. I like to help, I love to share the gospel, I want my life to be lived to glorify Jesus, who loved me and saved me from the punishment I deserve. 

It was fun to spend time with friends and to talk about the Lord. I am thankful for how much God has been working in our lives even when we don't see it. 

Joy in the Lord and work in marriage

When one holds fast to God it is easy to see that marriage is not to be all and all. I love marriage and the picture that it is supposed to be. I had asked for it from time to time before I got married wanting it so much that it had been an idol. I sinned grievously against the Lord during that time. My husband was different our relationship began with us talking about the Lord. I was scared in the first days of us knowing one another. Could he see how broken I had become because of my own sin. I had sought intimacy as a substitute for marriage in the past. Even though I was still struggling God had mercy on me. I was finally praying for what I longed for in my heart. Our marriage is not perfect I show so much selfishness at times. Hubby has at times his own sin struggles. We show patience and grace to one another. We push ourselves to love more, bear with one another more. We pray together, read the word together and seperately. We want the Lord to work in our lives. We have been taught by God to be this way towards one another. This has brought about an almost extended honeymoon stage not because we are perfect but because God has taught us to love. 

If Christ is the foundation of a union He must continue to be. 

Abba, you have been a Father to the fatherless. You have kept me from so much harm. Thank You for Your steadfast love and mercy. I ask that You will conform us more to Your image. That Your word work in our hearts and lives. May our marriage reflect the relationship between Christ and His bride the Church. You know our desires Lord please bring them about Lord.You are the Living God and I praise Your Holy Name. In the Name of Jesus, Amén.

Loving the church

It is hard to find a church, yet the church is necessary in the lives of believers. The fellowship of the saints is how we are encouraged, by gathering together, hearing scripture, worshipping the Lord together, and also receiving teaching. I love the church, the body of Christ. 

I have been really blessed in my husband that his leadership has helped my faith to grow. I have been reading God's word, worshipping, in prayer. I know that I could have taken the loss of sweet dear people in my  

life badly, yet I realized this scripture is true, "...if we are faithless, he remains faithful- for he cannot deny himself."

So what is my life like, well work is better more manageable. I want to do more crafts but that is just in my to do when I happen to have time. I spend time with friends. I still dance on occasion at home. I cook for my hubby. He is the main beneficiary of the food I make. I still go to church, i still enjoy the fellowship of the saints. I still love God's people. I seek that my eyes be focused of Christ, I seek to know the LORD (YHWH) more. I have not arrived in my faith seeing as there is more sin to kill within me. A way to grow in faith. The Lord is good, and I seek to glorify God with my life.

Why I left

I'm alone for a moment and I am at peace with where I'm at. I am always in need of the Lord but I know that He is with me. His staff and his rod they comfort me. He restores my soul.

I have been reading a book called Bully Pulpit by Michael Krueger. I am taken aback by how this brings everything back from 6 months ago. 

By August of 2023 I had been uneasy at church. The sermons I was hearing I could not bear. It was not conviction of sin but more I was discerning something that had been growing for a while. There was an undercurrent of bullying and I see it now for what it was. 

From the pulpit a person was preached against, a person who is a believer. I was already going downstairs because of my unease. Due to the sermon a church voted to excommunicate a brother and sister who were believers. That hurt so much, it was not even me. I could not stay. I left August 20, 2023. All I know is that man cannot take away a person's salvation.

So out of the whole situation the bible is speaks so clearly to me.

1 John 2:10-11 ESV

Whoever loves his brother abides in the light, and in him there is no cause for stumbling. But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes.